Holy Toxic!

Yes, last night was the worst that exploded out of our butts from the 4lbs of bean soup I had made for my family for the weekend..I had mentioned to the one of my weigh in ladies at Medical Weight Loss that I was stuck and could not move past the 40's in weight loss..it feels like it has been weeks since I have been stuck there...so she told me about the "Vegetarian Plateau Breaker" Great! I will try it..at this point I am willing to try anything..(well, you know I have my limits lol) So this is what my diet has consisted of for the last 2 days....

Breakfast: 2 eggs and 1 cup of bean soup.
Lunch: 1 cup of bean soup, 3/4 cup of brown rice, and 2 cups of lettuce
Dinner: 1 cup of bean soup, 3/4 cup of brown rice and 2 cups of raw greens
I could only drink water, tea and coffee (thank you this small pleasure was not taken away from me..) of course my usual 64 ounces of water and my 3 Nutrients..(I will explain that at another time)

There you have it..as exciting I mean boring as that is..I am praying for a 5 pound weight loss in the morning.. ha!

I traveled to my cousin's baby shower in Clare today. I picked up my mother along the way...it was nice to see her. I had let her borrow my copy of "The Amazing Adventure of Diet Girl" She really enjoyed it. Then she asked "so did you relate to Shauna in that book?" I said "Yes" She said "when did it start for you" and I am thinking...are you kidding me with that? What about all those times you told me I was fat and ugly growing up?????? I was screaming this inside my head...but yet I could not say one word to her? I am not sure why. Does she not ever remember saying those things to me? Has she blocked it out? I have completly forgiven her for her past actions..but I could not bring myself to tell her what was my main reason for my life long weight struggle. I do not want her to feel bad for some odd reason..maybe because I have forgiven and moved on? I can not figure this..yet, if I ever do decide to write a book about this and many other things in my life she is going to find out right? So when do I talk to her about this? She then goes on to tell me that she has never really had a food issue before and would just always skip a few meals and get back down to her weight she wanted to be at but now that she is nearing 60 it is much harder to do this....

What to do? Tell the mother? When? UGH!